I spent the Christmas holiday fairly traditionally, (though it was just us and not any extended family) and the day after is when the first fever kicked in. Illness in my house does not stop at a 24 or 48 or three day bug, because each child has to have their turn with it. They are all equal, fully. It can take weeks to leave our residence.
An ADHD child is much more manageable, in my opinion, when exhausted from fever. Though the panics over sudden discomfort when the fever is spiking are a bit alarming. So we had a quiet house, when it was his turn to be sick.
But keeping an ADHD child with PTSD quiet and indoors during the other children’s turns with this illness was much more difficult, and would have been worse for me to handle, three weeks ago.
When I had my update from the psychologist, I did not wait. I began with her recommended changes immediately. I am making a huge deal out of violent and disobedient behaviour. No tolerance or reasoning even with outbursts.
I have also begun mercilessly beating him at cards. He mentioned his therapist had begun doing this upon getting a family present at Christmas, a deck of UNO cards. I knew why she was doing this immediately. The first few games he somehow won three times in a row and I nearly despaired. Then it changed. The first time I beat him at UNO he had a tantrum and threw a chair. Today, after days of losing, he won, and he thanked me quite nicely for playing with him. He no longer makes any sort of fuss over losing.
I have seen some improvement from him. A marked decrease in violence, which is a step closer to the desired result, of no violence at all. A decrease in backtalk and disrespect, again a step closer. He has earned back a few Pokemon cards. Not many. He still does not have his Christmas presents back. If he wants them, he will earn them.
The baby has stopped hitting and pinching. She has been watching this play out. This is a great prevention, maybe years of therapy averted.
I have hope for the New Year. More than I did at this time last month.